My son has been drawn to candles all his life. I just started burning candles again this year, because I thought with him being 13 now, he could handle the temptation to stay away from their soft, silky texture or the desire to play with the hard wax around the outside that isn’t heated enough to melt yet. Well—to my surprise I was wrong. I’m still nagging at him to get his fingers out of the wax, or to stop pushing on the hard wax to make it collapse from its softened inner shell. For some reason, he loves playing with these flaming towers of temptation, and it’s an ongoing battle, that I refuse to lose.
I have to admit, they are kind of fascinating. I love how the thicker candles keep their shape, even though their inner core is melting and forming to the heat of the flame of the wick. I used to go to candle parties back in the early 2000. Remember those? Party Lite, I think it was called. Here, we were told that we should “hug” our bigger candles, so that we use up all the wax and that it doesn’t create a hollow hole in the center of the candle.
How many of us are like these candles that never got hugged? We are all shining on the outside, but inside we feel like a hollow empty person, that has been chiseled away over time. Our candle wick is becoming very short and we have a big deep hollow inside of us, but we don’t understand why. We can look at our life, and we seem to have it all. We have the house we dreamed of, the family that we planned, the spouse that we always wanted, but still something is missing. You can’t fathom why. Sometimes you find that you are sad just thinking about why you don’t feel complete. Why there is such an emptiness in your life.
Over time, we can let bitterness, hatred, and resentment set in to our souls. We don’t even realize that it is happening. Little things happen that we keep bottled up inside of us and don’t let go. Events go on that are out of our control and we hold onto it, for some reason, even though it is slowly tearing us apart inside.
Why do we let the little things bother us and eat away at us? Why do we care so much about simple things? Why do we keep score of everything that happens in our lives and let bitterness set in? Who does the most chores around the house? Whose job is the hardest? Which friend puts the most energy into your relationship? Which person does your boss seem to favor the most? When you stop and think about it, it is very immature thinking.
I remember saying to my mother, “You love my brother more than me.” I remember talking with friends and saying, “I’m done putting the effort into this friendship.” Sadly, I’ve lowered myself to telling my husband, “It only snows for four months a year, laundry is a daily chore.” Looking back, I was very guilty of letting all these little infantile events take root in my soul and it ate away at my inner core. I became empty inside because I was allowing these immature antics erode my soul…and my candle.
If we turn to the God to fill our emptiness, it is very rewarding. You will understand all your wrongs, and learn how to make it all right! Romans 15:13 reminds us, “May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope.” Once you let this happen, you will realize just how infantile you were being letting all the drama in your world suck the core and your soul out of you.
You have to let things go and move forward. Holding grudges, keeping score of life, jealousy and hatred are all wasted emotions that are not hurting the person that you felt wronged you, instead, these emotions are really just hurting you. Once you learn to not let the little things to bother you, you will finally feel free, and fulfilled.
Drama in our life, is a choice. You can let it ruin you and leave you like an unhugged candle, burnt out and empty, or you can hug your candle, and let the drama burn out of your life, and let your soul be filled with the love and joy that it deserves. Hug your candle today and keep the drama away!