Good Not Harm

My school is closing after being open for 149 years.  It really is hard to wrap your brain around how much has changed in this time period, and as we start to plan for our “Say Goodbye to Harkins” celebration I’m really realizing just how much really has changed.

I decided for my classroom activity, we would do a live wax museum, and have six different time periods.  The late 1800s, the early 1900s, the 1950s, the 1970s, the 90s, and of course today.  First thing I had to do is teach my children about what life was like in each of these eras, and to be honest, I really enjoyed going more in depth and learning more about each time period for myself.

The decade that struck me the most was the 1970s.  This is the decade I was born, but it was a very pivotal time for life as we know it.  Woman’s liberation really came alive, and the government stopped the ban on abortions and gave the right to the woman to decide whether she wanted to keep the baby or abort it.  There were huge jumps in technology, and industry as well, but the woman’s movement was the part that really echoed in my heart, probably because I have set a personal goal of reaching to become a Proverbs 31 woman.

Since this movement in the female race, we have been promoted to be self-sufficient and liberated from men.  Equal rights was their claim to fame!  We want to be treated as equals to men, but is this a reality?  Men are always going to be stronger, that is the way they are made.  They have strengths that we don’t have and we have strengths that they don’t have, but honestly, why does it have to be a competition?  We were created different for a reason.  We can fight this all we want, but human nature is going to fight back, because it is something that we can’t change.

Does this mean that we shouldn’t be allowed to make our own decisions?  Absolutely not.  I am proud of the women that stood their ground in the 70s and fought hard to win the battle of abortion.  Do I think it is right?  No, but should my beliefs be dictated onto someone else, who might feel that they want to have an abortion?  Again, no.  Just like I wouldn’t want anyone interfering in the choices that I make in my life.  That is why God gave us choices, so that we can make our own mistakes and grow from them.

Proverbs 31:12 is a great verse teaching us, “She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life.”  As women, we are to bring our husband good, and never harm him in any way all the days of our lives.  Woman’s Liberation might have something to say about this statement, right?  Maybe.  But in God’s eyes, and the only eyes that matter to me, we are to look after our husbands first and foremost.  Even above our children!  I know I’ve been desperately guilty of that one, but am slowly transforming myself I’m getting my priorities straightened out.

Before this quest, I honestly muttered under my breath and kept score of what I did and what my husband did.  What a horrible selfish heart I had.  Why did I have this heart? Foolishly, I believed that marriage is a 50/50 agreement.  I still believe this, but realize that I am not serving my husband for my husband—I’m serving my husband because it makes God happy.  Lucky for my husband, he reaps the benefits here on earth.

Now I willing and happily cook, clean, care for my children and geeze—I’m even learning how to stretch a dollar for my husband, which I never would have dreamed of doing before.  I even submit to my husband.  Does this mean he tells me what to do?  That is the furthest thing from the truth, but when a tough decision is to be made, I value his opinion and will do what he suggests.  I’ve hung up my nagging, begging and manipulating hat and now I allow him to lead our family, which he does with such ease, it amazes me.

How long am I going to try and live like this?  All the days of my life, because I’ve tried living married life the other way, the way women fought hard for me in the 1970s, and it didn’t function so well for me.  Since I made these changes, I have to admit, my life, my husband’s life and my children’s lives have totally transformed for the better.  You can judge me, just like those women who judge other women for having an abortion.  We all have our choices.  To me, my choice is the choice that God would want me to make, and now I am reaping the benefits.

Put caution to the wind, and try it for yourself.  Look at it as a walk with God and your husband just gets the benefits of this exercise!  Your marriage will become the fittest and happiest it has ever been.  Who would have ever known?

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