I’m getting crazy old! It’s my 25th high school reunion this year, and it is making me feel super old. It feels like yesterday that we had our 10th reunion, but somehow 15 more years have slipped by my eyes. I can think back and realize that in these 15 years, I have had my two children, moved to a new home, went back to university to get my education degree, taught at four different schools, traveled many different places, made lots of new friends, started writing a spiritual blog, and honestly the list is endless.
Not only is my list endless, I could have multiple lists of what changed over the last ten years with sub-categories for each. I could have a list of how I changed as a parent, as a wife, as a daughter, as a teacher, as a coach and as a person in general.
The changes that would like to talk about today is the changes I’ve made in my “person in general” sub-category. Ten years ago, I truthfully was no different than I was when I graduated. I still was very self-centered and egotistical. I was focused on being the best person I could be, but in all the wrong ways. I was focused on a good job, a nice house, a fancy car to drive, an endless wardrobe, and jewelry—I loved jewelry!
It was all center on me and what I looked like on the outside, not what I was on the inside. Having my children, obviously made me less selfish, because like most mothers I was putting my children’s needs in front of my own. Other than my children’s needs, I still was focused on my needs. I still was trying to control things so that I was happy.
It wasn’t until I made the New Year’s Resolution in 2015 to become a better wife that I stumbled onto literature that started explaining to me that I can’t change my husband, but I can change myself. What a concept. I had to change? Me? But in my self-centered world, I was perfect. I could do no wrong, it was everyone around me that was wrong.
I still remember the first book that I ever started reading on my pursuit to become a better wife. I typed in the words, “Become a better wife” on the Amazon search bar and “31 Days to a Happy Husband—What a Man Needs Most from His Wife” by Arlene Pellicane popped up. I thought, “SOLD!” and downloaded it to my Kindle. I excitedly sat down to read my new purchase only to read on Day 1, “From Chaos to Calm” a quote below it from the Bible! My reaction was, “What is this? Why the Bible scripture? What have I just bought? What am I going to read?”
The Bible verse was that from Mark 3:25, “If a house is divided against itself, that house cannot stand.” The wheels in my brain started turning. This makes so much sense! Is the Bible full of wisdom like this? Can I learn to be a better wife from a book that was written eons ago? Time has changed, what am I going to learn about becoming a better wife from the Bible? Little did I realize the journey that I was about to take!
I kept an open mind and would stay faithful to my purchase, reading it day by day and then paid special attention to the “Notice Today” highlights the author gave like, “Imagine the challenges your husband faces at work this week.” I started taking heed to the hints on how to make his life better. Also each day had a “Nurture Today” which were things like, “When your husband walks in the door today, greet him with a warm smile, a hug and kiss and straighten up the house before his arrival.”
This book started the changes in my life not only to become a better wife, but to become a better person. I couldn’t believe the wisdom that was in this book nor could I get enough of the Bible. I had no idea the Bible was full of so much wisdom. Here I was looking for the ultimate self-help book, when it was in my house all along, just gathering dust.
I am proud to say that I am not that selfish person that I was 10 years ago, or even 2 years ago. I learned that I can’t change anyone but myself. Once I changed myself to mirror the way God wants me to live, my entire world changed through the hand of God!
Are you stuck in your high school mentality? Are you still worried about you? Stop feeding your ego go and start feeding the needs of the people around you and watch the changes that unfold before your eyes. Give the wisdom of the word of our Divine Creator a chance and maybe it will surprise you as much as it surprised me. Time to grow up people!