I love how time changes everything. Most importantly, I love how time has changed me! I look back on the person I was, and I am so glad that I am no longer that person. I love how much I have grown, and matured. My biggest life accomplishment is how I finally learned to love myself.
People would say, you cannot love someone else until you truly love yourself, and I thought that I did love myself. But looking back on my life, I didn’t even as much as like myself. People who love themselves aren’t critical of other people. They don’t find faults in others. They just love others like they would want to be loved because they realize that we are all one.
It took me a while to understand and digest all that goes along with this concept. It wasn’t an instant connection for me. It was a gradual shift in my life. First, I started spending time with myself. Learning to connect with myself. I was portraying to love myself, but I didn’t like being alone. If you don’t enjoy a person’s company doesn’t that indicate that you may not like that person? Probably. I finally clued into this and started spending more alone time with myself and low-and-behold, I did start to enjoy my own company.
Years later, I really crave my alone time and need it. Some days, I would rather just be by myself to have my internal dialogue with myself. Now, I really love hanging out with me.
Step two on this road to self-love was learning that I had to remove all negativity from my life. The Law of Attraction really does exist, and every negative thought that we have affects our lives. I had to stop being so critical of myself. Forgive myself for my silly mistakes that I had made over my life and realize that I can’t go back in time, but I can change my future. Changing this future meant giving up thoughts and beliefs that I was a bad person. It meant that when I started being negative about something, I had to quickly change it and flood it out with positive thoughts instead. This is a trained response and takes time to master.
Finally, I just clued in to this last tip on how to truly love yourself while I was studying 2 Samuel. This chapter is about King David and how he was defending his kingdom and creating his dynasty. In chapter 10, as I was reading that he was being attacked from the front and the back and that was when it finally all fell together in my brain. We are all kingdoms. Our bodies and minds are kingdoms. These kingdoms area constantly under attack from all directions by negative thoughts that we bring on ourselves.
Thoughts of guilt, shame, envy, jealousy, anger, fear, anxiety and panic are all attacking us all the time, every day, but we have to fight for our kingdom like the wise King David did. He was the greatest King of the bible, even though he committed adultery and tried to have his lover’s husband murdered, he repented and then rose his kingdom to great victories.
We are all models of King David. Well, you might not have plotted to kill anyone, or had an affair on your spouse, but we all sin and do crazy things in this life that we regret. You can’t let the guilt and shame of your past life bring you down. Just like myself. I’ve done some horrible things to my kingdom that I wish I could change, but I can’t. I have to focus on fixing my kingdom from the ground up, or the inside out.
Even though David had turmoil in his life, especially after his affair and murder plans, he still enjoyed a very blessed life. He had to go through these tragic events to become all that he was created to be. He needed to hit bottom before he could rise his kingdom into the great place of victory.
We have to start thinking of our body, mind and soul as our own personal kingdom that our Creator has blessed us with and trusted us to become great rulers over. We have to start fighting for it all. It’s your choice what you do with your own personal kingdom that you’ve been given to reign over. You can give into the attacks of the enemy of negativity and surrender to a life that we don’t want to live, or you can start using the power within each and every one of us to start fighting back with your own internal army to a victory like no other.
After studying this book of the Bible, I feel 2 Samuel 7:16 really sums it up, “Your house and your kingdom shall endure before Me forever; your throne shall be established forever.”
Your kingdom, or your soul, will last forever, but what you do with this kingdom is totally in your reigning hands. King David was so incredible because he took his job as ruler of his kingdom very seriously, and listened to what God put in his heart. We all have the same repentant, loving hearts as King David, but we have to demonstrate genuine sorrow, and then move on. We can’t look back on past regrets. We have to keep battling forward until the army of negativity wave their white flag.
Once you see this white flag, you know the victory of truly loving yourself and the kingdom inside of you is yours. As soon as those negative emotions start retreating, your life will totally change around. David didn’t become this great King overnight. It was a long road, as was my journey of self-love. Day by day, you will see little victories, and it is these little victories that eventually have you ruling the throne of your kingdom with skill and precision, just like the great King David!